When You're 18 Going On 19...

(You're welcome, by the way.  That song will be stuck in your head for the next several hours.  My work here is done.)

As of last week, I am nineteen years old.  This is quite honestly ridiculous, and I don't know where the time has gone.  I'm still in denial that adulthood, which was once simply approaching, has smashed into my lovely little existence full force and used the sharp-edged pieces to scrape away whatever sense of normalcy I had left.

Okay, so that was a bit dramatic.

My life has changed a lot in the past year.  Being 18, I was suddenly, in the eyes of the world at large, an adult.  Even though I really wasn't.

As of this past year, I've come to realize one of the main problems with our society.  We expect 17-year-olds, in a matter of days, to do a complete 180 and face the world on their own.  I understand that probably, a hundred years ago, by this age I would have 3 kids.  But why is that a thing that happens?  Why am I expected to be an adult?

Sometimes I think Peter Pan had it right.  Let's never grow up and stay kids forever.  Let's be innocent and be friends and scrape our knees without worrying about permanent damage.

Doesn't that sound wonderful?

Maybe that's because it's comfortable.

Because growing up is scary.

Growing up means leaving behind everything we've known for as long as we've been alive.  It means exploring new territory, forging our own path, choosing our own fate.  Our parents can no longer make decisions for us (neither can they technically sign any official papers for us... which is completely throwing me off... because I actually have to remember to sign them for myself.)

But growing up is necessary.

"Do not let anyone look down on you because you are young,
but instead, set an example for the believers,
in speech, in life, in love
in faith and in purity."

~ 2 Timothy 4:12

Remember when you were little and said "It's going to be so cool to be a grown-up!".  Yeah, I remember that clearly.  I was in a rush to grow up, to be older, to be one of the big kids.

It hit me the other day while at dance that I was one of the "big girls" that little girls are looking up to and wishing to be.  To which I want to say, "Don't, kid, enjoy it while you have it."  But being at this age is kind of amazing when I think about it. 

I'm an example now.  I mean, I kind of always was, having two younger siblings, but now it's kids other than my siblings.  That's a lot of responsibility, but it's also really cool.  I officially graduated AWANA in April, but I haven't left it.  I came back, and now I'm working in a classroom rather than being a student.  It feels strange to be one of the grown-ups that I used to look up to and learn from.

I'm an adult now, even if I don't feel like it.  That's how the world views me.  I have trouble believing it sometimes, but it's true.  I have a witness that I've never had before.  I may be younger than most, but I'm also older than some, and that gives me a wonderful opportunity.

So I'm going to seize this year, and make it the best that it can be, setting an example for my fellow believers, just as Paul urged Timothy to do.  That's my mission... will you join me?

~ Abby